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I noticed we've got the Insight® Bowl and the Meineke™ Car Care Bowl this week. I was going to ask what the deal is with college football's bowl games, but I already know. . .corporate sponsorship run amok. Back in my day, new year's bowl games were each represented by good old-fashioned American staples, like Cotton, Liberty, and possibly Manure. When Woody Hayes snapped and attacked a player, it was during the decades-old Gator Bowl, not some contrived 21st century marketing event. But mark my words: the Obey Your Thirst Bowl and the Toby Maguire In Spider-Man 3 Bowl are just around the corner.
It's time once again to list my New Year's resolutions. It frightens me that you can take the word "woman", and merely by adding two letters, it becomes "wolfman". Is anyone else freaked out by this?!
Nothing spreads Xmas cheer quite like a hideous flea market ape.
Kevin and family join him in wishing you Happy Holidays.
The news, she is good: A Futurama comeback is being discussed.
I've just uploaded an mp3 demo of Dispatch, featuring me doing the world's 16th best imitation of Steve Winwood imitating Peter Gabriel. Check it out.
We just saw "The Lion, The Witch & The Wardrobe". This production is chock full of connections to the "Children Of Dune" miniseries: James McAvoy (Mr. Tumnus) previously played the son of Muad'dib, and the lady who plays the aforementioned Witch looks a lot like the actress who played Lady Jessica, but isn't.
According to the marquee sign at this one church, they were offering to wash and winterize your car for free. That's pretty convenient, because it's just up the street from the Baptist chapel where I got my tires rotated.
I should probably get a camera.
Whenever we go to Applebee's, or Chili's, or Bennigan's, or some similar restaurant, and our waiter is a gangly white guy, will he always end up being a total spaz who expects us to be his private audience while he pummels us with his "personality" and renders it nearly impossible to pursue a meaningful conversation amongst ourselves? That really seems to be our fate.
An art exhibit guaranteed to get some kind of reaction from everyone.
So, I and the wacky redhead to whom I'm married just celebrated our 14th anniversary. The secret? What I say goes, dammit, and that's final!
(Or not. Either way.)
Religion is so fucking awesome.
Cool - I just received a postcard from Guitar Center, notifying me of a special 10% off sale for two hours only (8 to 10am), on Friday November 25th. I am SO there.
A perfect gift for the inbred yokel on your shopping list.
"When you start getting in touch with the elephant, then you're beginning to move back and forth in time."
(I'm no proponent of yoga, but that quote is too good to ignore.)
Dear Mom: When you said "Hi", and I irreverently replied with "Hi" in an imitation of your voice, it was pure reflex. Honest.
From News of the Weird:
"The male nursery web spider uses a cheap trick to get sex, according to an October report in the journal Biology Letters; the male gives the larger female a dead insect, then collapses, feigning death, distracting the female, which turns to the insect, at which point the male springs back to life and mounts her."
It's uncanny how so many other creatures mimic us.
A Mark Mothersbaugh interview.
I can't get enough of those stories about Devo's early days. . ."lightning rod for hostility" is such a hilarious phrase.
Just because the tablecloth says "machine wash separately" doesn't mean you have to wash it separately. Don't give in to fear like that.
Grocery store. Check-out lane. Paying by credit card. I don't see a pen anywhere. The cashier hands me the one he had stuck behind his ear. . .and it's warm. Ewww.
I've uploaded the demo version of Peephole. Give it a listen, please. (And as usual, disregard the dummy vocals.)
Dallas ranks number 2 on Forbes' list of Least Safe Places, mainly due to our potential of high winds and hail.
"Don't you hate pants?!"
"There is nothing too 'wierd' about this scientific concept."
So, Thanksgiving is, like, any day now, and Dallas is facing record high temperatures in the 80's. At this rate, we may not see underwear weather until Xmas.
"Changing the way the world pays".
Wow - Piggly Wiggly stores are still around?
I've encountered a bug in Star Wars/Knights of the Old Republic for Xbox: On the planet Korriban, there are several Sith archeologists you can meet in the Valley of the Dark Lords. There's one named Dak, who will recognize a certain member of your party after you speak with him a couple of times. The two share a brief exchange regarding whose side of the war they find themselves on these days, after which Dak departs - he wisely sees the potential trouble of the a Jedi visiting the Sith back yard, and doesn't want to get caught in a conflict between his superiors and his old colleague.
The glitch then occurs when you find Dak in the cantina as you make your way back to the docking bay. He claims he's on the next ship out of town and practically denounces any affiliation with the Sith. You can tell him you don't want to take the chance of letting him alert anyone to your presence, and initiate a fight (which only actually goes down if the party member he knew from the old days is absent). Dak seems resigned to "get this over with", and battle ensues. After you kill him, head out Dreshdae's nearby exit toward the Sith monastary, then turn around and go right back in to the cantina: there's Dak, alive and stoically awaiting his departure. . .ready for the same confrontation. He carries some pretty good loot, and in addition to the XP for the kill, you earn a Dark Side point. So far in one game (featuring my Conscience-Free Scoundrel), I've killed him 6 times. I don't feel bad for Dak - despite his intentions, he still wound up in the wrong place at the wrong time. He always was a little too complacent when the galaxy threw guff his way. If I have any regret, it's for his old lady and her stim addictions; as a contract researcher, he had no insurance, and I assume she'll probably end up right back at one of those poorly-funded mining operations out on the rim as a whore.
Dude. I haven't worn contacts in 3 years, but I just found an unopened lens in the cabinet. It expired last month.
Dude.
I just read that Arrested Development's Portia DeRossi is gay.
Lines like this just won't sound the same.
"Meat normous", ladies and gentlemen.
But I'm certain that traditionally this word is always hyphenated. Let's check Merriam-Webster. . .
See, when you do a little objective research into the roots of the Master Race™, you find out about "its rejection of reason in favor of mystical experience, its subordination of human action to supernatural forces". Or that "it believed that the Aryan peoples of long ago were a special race of people who possessed special powers".
You can also learn of the original, holy meaning of the swasitka!
In fact, what a joy it would be if some sort of delightfully superior beings reared up and claimed that, "Yes, these Blessed White Aryans are indeed the pride and joy of our proto-cosmic seeding. That's why they'll be in charge from now on (with our direct supervision, of course.)"
Damn.
I'm about ready to go for a beer now.
Who wants to get sick? Not sick as in "impending bird flu crisis", but sick as in "deeply disturbed"? Check out Prussian Blue, the sweetest darn White Supremacist duo you've ever heard.
(I'm Irish and Cherokee, BTW, so I doubt I could likewise glorify the Fatherland even if I vanted to. Fluch!)
Suddenly the Dilary Huff sap I hear my kid listening to isn't so bad.
So we're watching "Star Wars: Revenge Of The Sith". It came with a bonus DVD which appears to be an account of the Skywalker family tree - so we might find out if they's part injun like I always figgered. Episode III is the best of the prequels, but overall none of them work like they did when I was 10 at the outset of the series (I wonder why that is). I'm still annoyed by how Liam Neeson died in "The Phantom Menace"; you'd think a Jedi Knight would go into battle wearing a cup.
Alan White and Geoff Downes discuss Yes and the cancelled More Drama tour (which wasn't coming through Dallas anyway).
The new hockey season brings us a fresh round of logo reviews from the exquisite Bush League Factor.
(Also, don't forget to set your microwave back an hour tonight.)
We seen us an old-fashioned kung-fu movie this evening. It was pretty good. Christopher Walken was insidious as the mysterious French noble. They left the story wide-open for another sequel; I hear they're already working on the screenplay for the legend behind Mrs. Zorro's radioactively white teeth.
The Bible Wheel site looks interesting. It features "a simple and direct geometric representation of the Holy Bible" which "reveals the supernatural structure of the Christian Canon by displaying the intrinsic geometric integration of the sixty-six books amongst themselves and with the twenty-two letters of the Hebrew alphabet". There's a lot of stuff there, but I haven't taken the time to read much of it.
In baseball, a team wins and they all go and shake each others' hands. I don't care for that. They should adopt hockey's tradition, in which teams lay down their weapons and shake the hands of their opponents and respectfully acknowledge a period of truce (until the next Hunter's Moon when the bloodshed begins anew, as freshly-sharpened skates are laced onto the ankles of slightly less over-paid combatants).
So I purchased and installed a new carbon monoxide detector, and the wife's car now has new wiper blades. I don't wanna hear anyone even imply that I'm not the Mayor of Safety Town.
Electromagnetic Fusion & ET Space Technology. Some kind of "interview" where one guy ax questions and another guy talk back.
I have to wonder whether that Canadian border constable on The Simpsons was right: maybe we Americans really are just a bunch of Shatner-stealing Mexico-touchers.
They haven't shown "Beneath The Planet Of The Apes" in weeks. What should I do?
You know you're sick when you taste blood in your urine.
If any of you are planning on dropping by in the next few days, can you stop and pick up a couple of things? We need a 20 ounce tub of "Boy, This Is Really Buttery!" and a half-dozen rookie Willie Mays baseball cards. Thanks.
The Simpsons is translated for Arabian TV. This reminds me of when we spent 2 hours in Mexico during our honeymoon and saw a street vendor selling t-shirts featuring the Simpson boy ("Bart Sanchez" it labeled him) saying "I am one radical dude!"
We're flipping TV channels.
Dr. Phil is on, featuring two women debating each other on the right of a mother to breastfeed her baby in public.
They both look like Romulans.
Kind of disappointing to learn that Black Sabbath's Tony Iommi didn't almost become the guitarist for Jethro Tull way back when. It's always interesting to follow the personnel interaction between bands I like, and in my teens, Sabbath and Tull were atop the list.
I always wished Ronnie James Dio would hook up with Steve Howe - they could be called Hell Yes.
Each October I consider coming to work on halloween wearing my usual office attire*, and then a few days later showing up wearing the back half of a horse costume and acting all pissed, as though whomever had initially agreed to wear the front half bailed and hung me out to dry. Maybe this is the year.
(* poodle skirt and kevlar vest)
"One of the secretions these aliens crave is adrenaline, which is generated in great quantity when the victim is tortured or traumatized at the moment of death."
Is not.
Not once have I heard an old timer point me out to his whittling buddies and say "That young feller there? Used to make the best whiskey e'er come outta the Appalachians. Don't make no eye contact, or he'll mesmerize ya like he done all his kin."
If you like your yokels drunken and your football scores lopsided, this is the weekend to be in Dallas for the annual Texas-Oklahoma football game.
Think I'll just stay home and read, thanks.
So the NHL season started tonight. I just took time to digest the new rules changes, and I can't say I'm impressed. My biggest issues are the addition of an overtime shootout, and the restricted area in which goalies are allowed to work the puck.
A shootout boils the game down to a series of one-on-one breakwaways and eliminates the tough defenseman or the reliable checking forward from the game's decision. It's a flashy shortcut to trimming down the number of tie games we'll see, but I guess low-attention-span quick fixes are the norm these days. Hockey is a team sport, though, and a few ties are okay.
Limiting a goaltender to passing the puck only from a limited zone is retarded. Their thinking is that it will allow attackers to gain control more often when they dump it in, resulting in more scoring chances and therefore more goals. My argument against this is that there are goalies who can pass, and have a shot at sending their team out on offensive breaks when given the opportunity. We won't see as many of those opportunities now, and the valid stick-handling skills some goalies have are now less of a factor. This is a lot like the designated hitter in baseball, now that I think about it. American League pitchers who can hit don't get to bat.
There's always talk about more offense, but defensive games are often more exciting. When a goal is scored, there's a release of tension, but when you have a near-miss, that accumulated tension doesn't break - it continues to mount, and each goal becomes that much more important. It's simple physics. Probably.
(Also, vote 'no' on Plan 9.)
I don't follow too many comics these days, but the best of what I do read is Batgirl. As good as Azrael was as a brainwashed ex-assassin seeking a new identity as an agent of Batman, they did almost as cool a thing when they gave an Asian girl named Cassandra a similar background and called her Batgirl. The story in issue #65 (from earlier this summer) climaxes when our Girl has it out with her incarcerated, bastardly dad. Very intense stuff here, recommended for cool chicks with father issues.
I passed my self-imposed memory test: Last night while falling asleep I was trying to recall the name of the French black guy who plays forward for the Oilers. Determined not to have to look it up, I finally remembered it this morning halfway to work. Georges Laraque.
I guess I do make decent money. But I'm still largely surrounded by my antitheses. Let's just see how this shit plays out.
Nonetheless, it's fun to occasionally blurt out (with the fatigued distress of an 8-year-old), "This is boring!"
So who likes Sonic? Good stuff, no? Last night, I tried their extra long Philly cheese steak, which came with the following safety disclaimer:
I've posted lyrics to new song built today, called "Dispatch", initiated by a slap bass riff I was messing with before I was hardly out of bed. I suck and my thumb hurts, but I'm happy with the results (and startled that it assembled so quickly). I can hear Peter Gabriel singing it in my head, but perhaps only because I've been in a real "Selling England By The Pound" mood this week.
If you or someone you care about suffers from schizophrenia, please - get help. There's no need to go untreated.
Seriously, this link is an absolute goldmine. . .
"The US government placed a Black African family next to my home, in my neighborhood which is an all white neighborhood and then the US government forced the female Black Africans to stalk me with their dog on the 4th of July several years in a row, which then got me placed into a hospital, and this went back in time to cause the US government to take away my scholarship in college by getting me sick with directed energy beams and placing me on disability benefits to encourage me to go to a hospital for help, which caused the whole dark reality in my life and in the future and past of Earth, since I was not able to live the normal life that I should be living in Michigan as a scholar, successful athlete, and a retired member of the US Military as well as a successful business man."
Better still: "Adolph Hitler much like Christ also wanted to be an artist and architect but since he was unable to be one, he was then forced to become a dictator which also lead to the downfall of Germany."
"We just want to apologize for being right."
For the Green Day fan(s) out there: The Artistopia page on the band features a sidebar listing other artists you may want to check out if you like GD. The list includes such names as Christine McVie, Keith Emerson, Jan & Dean, Wham, and Geddy Lee.
That's a pretty freaking broad spectrum there. A reload of the page includes other classic Green Day influences such as Hilary Duff and Elton John.
But it gets better. If you click on Geddy Lee, his own page opens, featuring a late-70's promo photo. . .underneath which is the caption "Photo by: www.dollclothesstore.com".
I can only conclude that the Oregon doll community is chock full of hardcore Rush fans.
This article truly evidences the nobility of the human spirit when others are in peril.
Sometimes when you think you've had enough, you lose it and cuss out God, but he just sits there and takes it, and finally says "You look tired."
When I die, I hope to be detonated wearing this.
So I got this email today from someone named Valerie, in another department. It merely said "Hey there! How R U?"
I don't know her, and never heard of her, and I'll assume it was meant for a different Kevin. Ultimately, I ignored it, but for a brief time I was tempted to respond with "Hey, gurlfriend! How have U been? Mike and i are sooo much happier now that he took that new job - he's a different person. We have got to have you all over for whatever and crepes. Joan from Marketing says that they said she said he said that Tiffani was already bragging about the promotion being hers. At first i was like 'whatEVER', but now i'm all like 'OMG! i can't believe she has the nerve' but then we all know how she's been acting since that thing with you-know-who, and everybody's noticed it but her. Sooo typical, puh-LEAZ it's not even funny i mean really but anywho. i have to do lunch today with my so-called team. but maybe Friday we can sneak away to that new place with those gorgeous desserts my treat. TGIWednesay tomorrow i am sooo ready for Labor day. TTFN!"
"Something amazing is going to happen very soon in the Mediterranean Sea off Cyprus: they are going to uncover the lost island of Atlantis."
Rock-and-roll, baby.
Meanwhile. . .
"Evidence of Time Travel has been discovered by an Australian researcher. This evidence reveals the Source of ancient Myths, Legends, and Religions."
Well, dadgum - they cain't both be true. Where can a sincere, gullible lad such as myself turn?
I see that Google found no matches for the phrase "doting co-worker", and the phrase "self-appointed mother figure" pulls up only a handful. Surely I'm not the only used-up bloke who suffers this kind of crap. . .
Final score: FC RoboSapien 2, England nil.
I buy digitar vrideo. Is a "Bes In Show". Ervey one invite a come touch it.
If someone ever told me "You're Too shy shy, Hush hush, eye to eye", I'd be like, "No, YOU are, jerk!"
I have to wonder how termites feel about the way they're depicted in cartoons.
Saturday nights are cherished by most as the time for wild, reckless indulgence, and I'm no exception. After getting my hair cut, we stopped for ice cream. A Chevy SUV next to us in the parking lot had the phrase "ford sale" in its window, with a phone number. Both the back side and opposite windows stated "ford sale" as well. I'll assume it belongs to the people at that one ghetto garage that features the "We fix flats tire" sign.
Upon arriving home, I turn on the hose to water the house's foundation. What do I find in the front flower bed? A torso from a Spawn action figure. Sometimes life throws too much excitement at me and I have to sit down.
Wow - my very own Xanex prescription. I'm used to bumming off others. Have I arrived, or what?!
I received the following story via email:
A Japanese company and an American company decided to have a canoe
race on the Missouri River. Both teams practiced long and hard to
reach their peak performance before the race.
On the big day the Japanese won by a mile.
Afterward, the American team became very discouraged and morally
depressed. The American management decided the reason for the
crushing defeat had to be found. A Management Team made up of senior
management was formed to investigate and recommend appropriate
action.
Their conclusion was the Japanese had 8 people rowing and one person
steering, while the American team had 8 people steering and one
person rowing. So American management hired a consulting company and
paid them an incredible amount of money.
After six months of hard work, they advised that too many people were
steering the boat, while not enough people were rowing.
So the American Team acted: To prevent losing to the Japanese again
next year, the rowing team's management structure was totally
reorganized to 4 steering supervisors, 3 area steering
superintendents and 1 assistant superintendent steering manager.
They also implemented a new performance system that would give the
one person rowing the boat greater incentive to work harder. It was
called the Rowing Team Quality First Program, with meetings, dinners
and free pens for the rower. Even new paddles and medical benefit
incentives were promised for a winner. We must give the rower the
empowerment and enrichments through this quality program.
The next year the Japanese won by two miles. Humiliated, the American
management laid off the rower for poor performance, halted
development of a new canoe, sold the paddles and canceled all capital
investments for new equipment.
The money saved was distributed to the senior executives as bonuses
for a job well done.
Please tell me I'm not the only one who realizes we could save on our water bill by peeing in the yard. You wouldn't need to turn the hose on, and you'd be flushing the toilet less. How is that not win/win?
More on negativity.
Wow.
I can't help but speculate what kind of recalcitrance will ultimately characterize those deemed "unable to proceed to the next level of evolution".
(Also, I think I need some sort of ergonomic mouse, because my wrist feels like it's developing tourette syndrome.)
"Real peace isn't just the absence of war. It is the absence of negativity".
Now we're getting somewhere. Earthlings need to learn to deny what we don't like, while simultaneously rolling out a psychic red carpet for just any "higher power" that comes along. Because they're all harmless friends, and in no way parasitic.
So the girls come home from afar as Fruit²O drinkers. I tried some - pretty good for no calories or anything. I have to wonder, though, if replacing water's usual hydrogen with two fruit atoms alters any of its chemical properties. Does its specific heat remain the same? Is the molecule still asymmetrical? What about self-ionization? Makes you wonder.
I hear that the guy who acted Scotchie on Star Trek was killed last week. Even though he was just a fictional alien, everyone could relate to him. Live long and prosper, Scotchie.
You know how you feel when you've been on your own for several days because your wife and kid are away on a hybrid vacation/business trip, and you only just now discover that you have paper plates that you could have been using this whole time (as though you remotely considered needing any up 'til now)? That's exactly how I feel at this moment.
I'm in a rather devious mood today. There's this lady from another department who walks by our work area a couple times a day. She looks like she might've been named Miss Sun Tan of 1988. I want to ask her: "Is that genuine leather?"
Damn. Isn't there any co-worker problem that can be resolved by putting stuff in their food?!
From the Med-Students-With-A-Lot-Of-Free-Time files: the injuries of Darth Vader diagnosed, based on a variety of Star Wars resources.
I'm not sure that I'd be very good at being staunch, but I should probably find something to be staunch about and at least give it a try.
Episode III wasn't bad. Although it did trigger the realization that the destruction of Yavin itself would have screwed the Rebellion just as bad as blowing up the moon they inhabited in Episode IV, so the Death Star really didn't need to waste time getting around the planet. Which is a mere afterthought to the goofy necessity of that thing requiring hyper-drive to get from system to system. And, truly, the best Jedi the galaxy has ever known is actually Sayonara Nip.
(Also, real wookiees are crawling with parasites.)
So I'm looking at MSN's movie listings to determine when we can catch Star Wars: Episode III, and I see that the review header lists Adam Sandler. A reload of the page instead lists Tina Fey, and a third try says Cedric The Entertainer. I guess Lucas really pulled out all the stops for this one.
It's true what they say about your prostate.
Family Guy is named Entertainment Weekly's Worst Show of 1999. That's too bad. I can only assume EW's Ken Tucker missed last night when Peter shot milk out of his nose while laughing, despite the fact that he wasn't drinking anything.
Does anyone have my Hardcore Devo Volume 1 disc? I'm not finding it, and that hurts my feeling.
Life is hell. And they wonder why the teen suicide rate is so high.
Some guy's review of "Batman Begins". I'd actually give it a higher score than B-minus. It's good enough that I want to see it again this weekend. I say this as a comics reader, but our showing of the film was full of middle-aged couples who don't exactly fit the comic-book-dork demographic, and there was applause at the movie's end; thus, Regular People seemed to love it. Which is sometimes a bad thing, often indicating substantial amounts of cheese and/or crap. But not this time.
Life is short, though. This flick will be out on DVD for Xmas, and by the time I'm 40, you'll be able to see it on TBS once a month. Geez, I hope we have a house by then.
The fun never ends on this so-called "inter-net".
Former Bush Team Member Says WTC Collapse Likely A Controlled Demolition And 'Inside Job'. What really creeps me out is that the article's site features the same color scheme as I do here.
An excerpt from "The True Adventures of a Gov't. Psychic Spy", via The Universal Seduction, a sort of conspiracy theory free-for-all. Another good article is "The God Machine".
This summer marks the 25th anniversary of the Yes album "Drama" and its subsequent tour. I was recently gifted with a bootleg disc of a New York concert from September of '80, and find it hard to turn off. The revered Jon Anderson had left the band, and Trevor Horn, with a similar voice, had taken over lead vocals. Horn struggled at times hitting the highest notes in the older songs, but when he's on target, it sounds great. Unfortunately, by the tour's end, he was taking a lot of heat from unforgiving fans in the UK.
I present here a couple of mp3 highlights from the show:
"And You And I" (finale). . .Horn's best performance of any of the Yes classics.
"We Can Fly From Here". . .This is a really good song that was never released. You can hear the foundations of both Asia (with Steve Howe & Geoff Downes) and the further-revamped Yes (produced by Horn) that would emerge two and three years later, respectively.
I'm forming my own new religion based upon the following Universal Precept, mastery of which will renew the Sacred Self with cosmic harmony. . .
"Please print."
Curly is most everyone's favorite, and rightfully so, but I still insist that Shemp is underrated. I love the one where they encounter a genie from a lamp, and Shemp keeps referring to him as the "genius", as though he's able to magically grant wishes because he's so smart.
If you're one of the gamers who used to participate in the OverPower chats on AOL 7 or 8 years ago, and recall one in which someone with the screen name of "Mrs Weaver" was periodically saying "MILDRED?" and "WHICH BUTON DO I PUSH TO TALK TO MILDRED", and wondered just who the hell that old lady was. . .it was me.
What are we coming to when you can't drink breast milk that isn't tainted by rocket fuel?!
Memorial Day weekend: when all over the nation, we honor our fallen heroes with the traditional Three-Day Blowout Sale.
We're actually having friends over to sit around the campfire and tell ghost stories. By "campfire" I mean "TV" and by "tell ghost stories" I mean "watch TV".
And I've discovered that my arch-enemy and head soiled-doily-scrubber Sean is now playing bass for a band called Arcade Academy.
Life has taught me that there was this one time at my old job when I found a used band-aid laying on the men's room counter, and even though it was soaking wet, it looked like it might still stick if you tried to re-use it.
Another crop circle article, this time discussing peoples' ability to develop a psychic connection with the earth's energies, at the encouragement of the unquestionably benign and noble "Shining Ones".
Today is the 22nd, which makes me nine days late in celebrating the 50th anniversary of "The good wife's guide", which I first encountered 3 or 4 years ago via #!/usr/bin/girl.
Enjoy.
So I'm working on a demo of "This Grain Of Sand", and I added a third guitar solo, which I'm presenting as a 22-second stand-alone piece entitled "Love Me Like A Varmint (SpaceAge Edit)".
Here's an article about a conference regarding the cause of crop circles. "Extraterrestrials remain a popular explanation, and, among Jungians, multi-dimensional beings who may or may not be from outer space."
Day 1 with the new wallet I bought went pretty well, THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH FOR ASKING.
An interview with Mr. Boffo creator Joe Martin. Note the classic Psychiatrist strip, one of my favorites.
Ya see? YA SEE?! I'm rolling downhill now, at an upward slope. Why am I here at work shoveling computer parts? I should be buried beneath my music gear, plotting against Silence. Yesterday I actually looked into the possibility of suckering some sort of arts grant from somewhere. That's pretty damn pathetic. I should have called in Creative this morning.
"Hello, Boss? I can't come in today. I have a handful of songs I need to polish up, and a half dozen more that are ready for some mortar. Sorry; maybe I'll come to work tomorrow."
The aforementioned time travelers' event at MIT was actually quite boring and didn't have an all-you-can-eat buffet, so I'm not going after all.
The Time Travelers Convention at MIT. If you can't make it this weekend, you can always still go this weekend if you're around when time travel becomes available.
So the company where I work announced that they'll no longer be providing cups, paper plates, or plasticware in the breakroom. You want coffee, you'd better bring your own cup (or steal someone else's).
As a Team Player and coffee drinker, I'm taking it upon myself to buy some cups and bring them in periodically. Sure, I could pay $1.50 for several dozen plain white foam cups, but our burly, rugged warehouse crew deserves the best. . .such as these ballerina slippers or pink poodles. It's the least I can do.
Crap! My libarry is gonna be closed for a couple of weeks. I better go and check out a bunch of crap on Saturday.
People should @#$% try to respect when you call "No Backsies", because obviously it means that you don't want whatever it is back.
The India Daily is an interesting read, featuring such propag articles like this one. And then they've got all these celebrity scandals and crap featuring Indian movie stars. (Who knew that the Dia Mirza nude scene rumors were true?!)
Cause of death: Premature autopsy.
There must have been an "L" missing. . .that place probably wasn't really called One Star Donuts.
The only downside to turning 38 this past week is that I can no longer use that line from "Monty Python & The Holy Grail":
"I'm 37. I'm not old."
Now available: lyrics for a newly completed song.
Sponsored by the Trombone Bayonet™ - outlawed by marching bands everywhere.
(Thank you. I'll be here all weak.)
Today marks the Cambodian New Year. It's the Year of the Rooster, so keep an eye out for that Lyle Lovett comeback.
Looks like a couple of weeks ago, the Mars Odyssey orbiter captured a fresh image of the controversial face formation located in the Cydonia region of Mars.
Black Belt Jones: "The punchin'est, kickin'est, choppin'est dude ever to hit the big screen".
I've uploaded my mp3 demo of the song "Cry". You're invited to check it out, and offer feedback. The vocals aren't ridiculous and the guitar solo is tolerable. . .what more could you want in a song?
The pompous boss-types are gathered together discussing last night's TV shows. I'd love to drift over and say "Ya know, there's a show I like. . .it's called Get The Hell Back To Work!"
Unfortunately, that would probably kill my chances of getting a laugh with my April Fool's joke of lighting our (Glorious) Leader's oily comb-over on fire later on.
So, The Company's team-spirit-building event this week is a paper airplane contest out in the warehouse. My minion and I took the liberty of sharing our innovative plane design with some of the participants, though none seemed interested in utilizing our revolutionary model.
(I'll admit: we based our airplane on the infamous Origami Boulder - with enough thrust behind it, its compact weight distribution compensates nicely for its lack of aerodynamics).
I posted this Pirate Compensation diagram on the HR bulletin board in the breakroom last Friday. It's actually still there, so apparently this company does care about the seafaring marauders on its payroll.
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